Now those of you that have been reading my blog know that I have a serious chicken problem. I share a plot of land with two other families, and they have TONS of chickens. Now this wouldn't be an huge issue except for the fact that when the chickens have little baby chicklets they turn into crazy-mutant-angry-hens. Its straight out of a comic book. You take one step in their direction and its BAM chicken in the face. They also really enjoy coming into my house to eat skeeters dog food. If you have ever been stuck between a crazy-mutant-angry-hen and the door you will know how scary this can be. Imagine a chicken in your face screaming, jumping up in the air, scratching at you with its talons, and trying to peck your eyes out with its beak. Crazy ish. Anyways I take it out on them by eating them and their eggs bwahaha. So I guess the moral of the story is Chickens... you can't live with them you can't live without them.
So back to my real story...The other day I was out on my front porch drinking my coffee, reading my email, and sending all the passers by on their way with a good morning. I was out there for a good long while, and then I realized I should probably go change my clothes and attack the crazy weed situation in my front yard (no joke them weeds are on steroids). So I entered my room and... BAM! chicken in the face! It scared the bajezus out of me. Once I came to my senses I realized I needed to get this thing out of my room. This resulted in a five minute battle that could have been straight out of a cartoon. It left me bleeding, and my room a disaster. I took a deep breath and was a about to laugh when I saw it. A beautiful little white gem in my bed... the crazy-mutant- angry-hen laid and egg IN MY BED! gross.
Ok. Before I start story number two let me say.... please do NOT continue reading IF you are grossed out by bowel movements, you are romantically interested in me, or there is a chance you may be romantically interested in me in the future. just saying.
If you were a peace corps volunteer, or you have ever spoken with one, you know that about 80% of our conversations revolve around poop. It is a very natural, very comfortable topic for us which can be awkward when we speak to people from home. So I apologize ahead of time. Now before I tell you my poop story I have to tell you that ever since I got back from Christmas break my community has not had water. I have a tap in my yard that would get water for an hour or two every 5 days. So during that time I would have to fill up a big 50 gallon drum to use for the rest of the week. Well our aqueduct dried up, and they now have to build a new one.... sooooo we haven't had water for over 3 months now. This means that we have to go to the river to collect water, or the wealthier people have dug big holes in their backyards to use as wells. Luckily, I have a latrine so I don't need water to flush (i only need it to bathe, wash dishes, clean my house etc). People who have regular toilets have to flush them by dumping a bucket of water in them at the perfect angle with the exact amount of force. Now the "clinic" (aka empty building) in my community has a regular toilet. I am lucky because I get to hold my meetings there since nobody is using it.... but at the same time, nobody is using it, so there is no water tank or ANY source of water. This usually isn't a problem because I am only there for a couple hours at a time, and I can go to the house next door to use the restroom if I need to. Well, the other day I was there for a REALLY long time doing the individual consultations with my weight loss program participants. I had a 30 minute break in between participants so I was planning my lecture for the next week when all of a sudden I felt "the drop".... dun dun dun. Now I like to use the term "the drop" when you have had a rumbly tummy for a while, but nothing too crazy, and all of a sudden you feel the plumpfff or "the drop" when whatever craziness inside of you all of a sudden relocates itself right outside of your anal sphincter ... or in other words the " oh sh*%# I need to find a restroom in the next 30 seconds before I explode" moment. Well, it happened. In the clinic. So I ran next door to the latrine... and it was occupied. I knew I wasnt going to make it so I ran, clenching with all my might, back to the clinic. I don't even know what happened next... it was a very stressful time and I don't remember the series of events.... but the end product was a deuce in a plastic bag. I was so shocked, disturbed, whatever you want to call it that I had to sit there (after disposing of the bag of course) and process. I just kept saying "I just shit in a bag. I just shit... IN A BAG" After the initial shock wore off (and a very supportive phone convo with fellow PCV James) I was finally able to laugh about it, and I guess I felt the need to share it with y'all. Im sorry about that haha.
Okay on to serious stuff. We just finished all the Semana Santa (Easter Week) celebrations which include lots of church events, lots of habichuelas con dulce (sweet beans), alcohol (for the men), and trips to the river and beach. Everyone that lives in the cities comes to the campo to visit family and go to the beach which is great for the Dominicans but SUCKS for the peace corps volunteers. Its like the first week in your community all over again. Nobody knows who you are, everyone thinks you know nothing about dominican culture, and they assume you are a lost tourist. Anyways, I took the opportunity to hang out with the kids and explain the american tradition of easter egg hunts. They enjoyed dying the eggs, but they thought I was CRAZY when I tried to explain that a magical bunny comes and hides them in the yard and then all the kids have to go find them. In fact, they thought I was so crazy (even after a few HOURS of explaining it to them and showing them pictures on the internet) that I decided to skip the whole hunt part and just dye the eggs. This worked out okay anyways because the kids ate all the eggs immediately after dying them.... so there wouldn't have been any eggs to hide anyways haha.
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| My host mom and I making habichuelas con dulce. |
Work has been going well. I have been super busy with the Reto de Rebaja (Weight loss challenge). I will be writing a complete update on that shortly. I want to take a few pictures of one of our exercise classes before I write the blog. I am still giving english classes twice a week, working with rural health promoters and teenage peer educators, and still waiting for my grant money to build the clay stoves. If I stay this busy the next 6 months are going to fly by!
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